So long to the holidays

Date: Feb. 11
Mileage: 14.3
February mileage: 238.2
Temperature upon departure: 23

Geoff and I skim across the surface of Mendenhall Lake, he on skate skis, me on “studs” and a mountain bike. Side by side, we glide steady at 10 mph. He slashes up the groomed track; I draw a straight line through several inches of dry powder. The flat surface radiates a blaze of unfiltered sunlight, blinding to the point of hypnotizing. Through a heavy squint, all I can make out is a white slate stretching uninterrupted for more than a mile in all directions. The tracks of others veer off in shadowed tangents that remind me of curves on a line graph; their creators stand at variable points in the distance. Geoff and I move parallel along the axis, where I can’t help but weave through a barrage of vague images from 11th-grade calculus.

After standing in the shadow of the glacier terminus, much too close for comfort, we veer off the lake and hit the moraine trails. Inches of new snow slow us both down, but we push on through the the crackle and click of powder-dusted singletrack. Rides like this, when surging up even small hills is a losing battle against sand-like resistance, can at times be sweaty, heart-pounding work. But on days like today, when the forest is full of sweaty people smiling in the sunlight, they can hardly be counted as workouts.

I think about where 2007 has taken me so far ... simple moments of awe and joy cut like razors through my daily routine. I think back to the holiday season, spent thousands of miles away from my family, and how it was in turn overwhelmingly hectic and largely meaningless. The first six weeks of the new year, on the other hand, have been full of selfish gifts and selflessly quiet reflections. When I began training for the Susitna 100, I embarked on a journey so daunting and encompassing that I could be forgiven for letting social, financial and domestic obligations fall by the wayside. It was a holiday from myself, from the day-to-day hassle and general realities of life.

And now that it’s nearly over, I’m like a kid counting down the days until Christmas - almost blind with anticipation but, at the same time, already feeling a sense of loss for the inevitable day after.

Bicycle obesity

Date: Feb. 10
Mileage: 24.9
February mileage: 223.9
Temperature upon departure: 22

By the time I reached the top of the second flight of stairs, my heart was racing. I hoisted my bike over the final step and dropped it with a thud on the ice, then leaned against the house until my head stopped spinning. Usually, my pre-ride weight training doesn’t leave me more exhausted than the ride itself. But, then again, I’m not used to packing a bike weighted down with most of the gear you’d need to survive a winter night in Denali.

After I caught my breath, I purposely went out and rode the hilliest route I could find. Motoring up hills seemed vaguely harder, but downhills are what really brought weight gain into the forefront of my thoughts. At one point, I hit 32 mph while coasting down a snow-covered slope (the kind of surface in which brakes are generally a bad idea.) Scary.

After I came to the end of the road and turned away from the sun, I caught my first glimpse of my shadow pedaling that bicycle behemoth down the street. It looked so funny, lumbering ahead of be, that I couldn’t help but surge toward it. The return ride was noticeably faster.

After I returned home, I pulled out my bathroom scale to weigh it for curiosity’s sake.

The verdict: Bicycle and stuff = 47 pounds. Once I throw in water, a few articles of extra clothing and food, I could be pushing 60. So I have a little weight problem. Oh well. Things could definitely be worse.

Much worse. On a more somber note, I have been reading all of the race reports from this year’s Arrowhead 135. Harrowing, harrowing stuff - hypothermic cyclists who had to be dragged off the trail in their sleeping bags; people who froze their hands changing tires; severely frostbitten toes. They were people who didn’t seem to fully grasp the realities of -30 ... people no different than me. I read these stories with the morbid fascination of someone who could experience the same thing in a week’s time. I read them while chanting to myself that the chance of -30 is very, very slim. Then I nestled further into my warm computer chair and struggled with those sweeping thoughts about the grand insanity of it all.

A copy of Wend Magazine came my way earlier this week. Inside is a great article by Mike Curiak, the endurance cyclist who has singlehandedly conquered many of the most difficult mountain biking challenges in the United States. But in this article, he doesn’t talk about his triumphs and trophies. He talks about a single incident along the lonely Iditarod trail, where, buffeted by 80 mph wind and subzero cold, he contracted hypothermia and nearly died. Despite all of his experience and preparedness, he found himself buried in the depths of a storm in one of the most remote regions of the world. He knew in his heart that no one was coming. And as he lay wrapped in his sleeping bag, slipping further and further toward unconsciousness, he realized that no one could save him but himself.

The next thing he realized, or at least the next thing he wrote about, was the crackle of a fire in a village cabin some five miles down the trail. An Alaska Native man on a snowmobile found him cocooned in his bag and carried him to safety. I found it to be an inspiring story ... that even at his most alone, he wasn't alone.

Gear check

Date: Feb. 9
Mileage: 26.4
February mileage: 199.0
Temperature upon departure: 24

I did a fairly short ride today, and then spent the better part of the afternoon putting together most of my gear for the Susitna 100. The above picture is what I'm going to wear ... or carry with me, in case I need to wear it. I'll probably adjust it quite a bit based on the weather forecast, but you never know when you're going to get wet, so I'm going the carry the extra gloves, socks and a base layer no matter what. Everything else is clockwise, from the upper left: water resistant shell pants, Northface winter hiking boots, N.E.O.S. overboots, neoprene gloves (my spares), middle fleece layer, base layer (a basic cycling jersey. I can use the little back pocket to hold chemical warmers if I want to), top fleece layer, bike pogies, fleece balaclava (spare, and it probably won't go unless it supposed to be below 0), lightweight neoprene socks (spare), heavyweight neoprene socks, polypro tights, fleece long johns, and my winter shell. In the middle are the helmet, goggles, liner socks, liner gloves, mittens and wool socks. Again, I might not need all of this. But unless the weather forecast calls for nothing below 10 and nothing above 33 (the kind of temps in which you're likely to get wet from rain or melting snow), I'll likely wear or carry all of it. Phew! I can be really high maintenance.

I also gathered most of the required gear. With any luck, I'll never have to use it. I know that sleeping bag looks like it weighs a ton. It does. I believe its just over six pounds, and it doesn't stuff very small either. But it's really toasty, and I didn't have to give up food for a week to pay for it. So I'll schlep it over the tundra. Next to it is your basic thermarest sleeping pad (I traded my pad with Geoff, Dave, because I have space issues and he has weight issues. So he gets the super light nice one that you sent me.) The rest is headlight, bike tool, fuel (I'm going to buy new fuel in Anchorage), lighter, pot, bike pump, stove (that's its box. It's currently en route to Palmer via USPS. I didn't trust that the airport baggage security people weren't going to take it away from me), chemical handwarmer packs, Camelbak (I'm sticking with the big one because it has great insulation, but I'm not carrying much more than water inside of it), and a bivy sack, generously on loan from Eero, an artist in Fairbanks.

That's my stuff. Good grief, it does take a lot to do a bike ride in the winter.

I don't know how much it all weighs. Comfortably over 15 pounds, I'm sure. I've never put much effort into lightening the load because I'm not really a front-of-the-pack person. I'm in this thing to feel confident and have fun, and best of all, survive. Last year I carried about the same amount of gear. I struggled to stay afloat on my bike much of the time and never even cracked into my bags, despite getting caught in heavy rain and getting soaked through and through (I kept all of my dry gear in reserve in case my core temperature dropped, and that never happened.) But would I carry it again, even if it wasn't a race requirement? In a heartbeat. If there's one thing the Alaska wilderness is, it's unpredictable. Self-sufficiency is worth 10 times its weight in comfort and confidence.

And the best part is ... I have it all ready, a week early! Tomorrow I'm going to load it all up on Snaux bike to test how it handles. Sorry for the boring, long list post today. But typing out all of this is actually helpful to me. You know what's another completely self-absorbed thing I can do, because this is my blog? Post silly pictures of my pets. This is Geoff's cat, Midnight, eating thread. She was doing this when I arrived home from biking today, so I have no idea how much she actually injested before I literally cut her off with a pair of scissors.

Wow. One more week. I'm terrified.